There are people learning latin, people cleaning cars
people doing jigsaws and working out with stars
the neighbour's cleaned his gutters till they're absolutely clear
and I sit on my big fat arse and sip another beer
there's jet washing of driveways and tinkering with tools
baking cakes with sprinkled flakes, malfunctioning home-schools
people dressed in lycra are giving me the fear
so I sit on my big fat arse and sip another beer
there's polishing and painting, queuing at the shop
sweaty palms and lack of calm as money-markets drop
there's staring at the skies if random planes appear -
and I sit on my big fat arse and sip another beer
there's flattening the curve, and fattening the face
there's wishing that your family were in some distant place
but I don't give a monkey's if we are locked down for a year -
I'll still sit on my big fat arse and sip another beer.
By Matt Goodfellow